Well I lost my job when
inflation hit the fan
‘cuz my boss didn’t care if I
ended in a trash can.
Because I was expendable and
the statistics were dependable
That our country was facing
the inevitable
Loss of demand for the
supplies we were stacking
And with that my superiors
sent me packing.
I thought to myself “I’ll
just find another job.”
But, oh no, I was wrong so
let me sing this song
About the unemployment rate
that stuck me in the mob.
“If Average Joe and Middleman
Stan
Are fighting for the same
spot as Lonesome Dan,
While the Big Cheese can pick
and choose as he please
Bringing all the honest
working folks to their knees
Because the unemployment rate
is sky high
And I really think my way of
life is gonna die
So pick up your sign and step
in line
‘cuz the unemployment rate is
undefined.”
I didn’t want trouble from
the guys at work
But one thing happened that
really friggin hurt
My best friend Steve had
snagged my spot
While the older gent of
thirty years seniority did not.
And I said to him, “Hey man,
how’d you land that?”
He said, “Was easy. They need
new blood ‘cuz the boss smelled a rat.”
He smiled at that, not
knowing what he said
And how it all just clogged
up my head.
That’s when I started to get
to thinking
How bad I wanted to punch him
and start singing,
“If Average Joe and Middleman Stan
Are fighting for the same
spot as Lonesome Dan,
While the Big Cheese can pick
and choose as he please
Bringing all the honest
working folks to their knees
Because the unemployment rate
is sky high
And I really think my way of
life is gonna die
So pick up your sign and step
in line
Because the unemployment rate
is undefined.”
And when I arrived at the
protest assembly
With all the other people
there surrounding me
I heard them say that “Our
taxes need to go away,”
So I decided to listen
closely and to stay
But this protest of the
ninety-nine percent
Started something I later
came to regret.
They hurled rocks at the
stores and vandalized the streets
While a banker was stomped on
by jerks wearing cleats.
The police came in force,
decked out in riot gear
And the SWAT teams stopped by
to add to the fear
The mob of people swarmed the
cops
Fists and picket signs up
when I heard the pops
Of tear gas canisters and
rubber bullets cut into the crowd
The noise of it all was too
damn loud.
And as the smoke screen began
to clear up,
I found that I was in a van
to be locked up.
As the van began to return to
the station
My mind quickly had a
revelation
“If Average Joe and Middleman
Stan
Are fighting for the same
spot as Lonesome Dan
While the Big Cheese can pick
and choose as he please
Bringing all the honest
working folks to their knees
Because the unemployment rate
is sky high
And I know my way of life is
gonna die
So drop your sign and get out
of the line
Because the unemployment rate
is undefined.”